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When to Change or Call it Quits?

Change is scary, and moving into the unknown can be intimidating. Some people stay in unsatisfactory jobs and relationships, including abusive relationships, to avoid change and uncertainty. Moreover, society often praises perseverance and shames quitting as a lack of determination, thus influencing our choice to stay in an unhappy situation. Another reason people stay in an unsatisfactory situation is that making a change seems like wasting time and effort already invested in it. So staying put seems more comfortable even when there is a better option elsewhere. It is essential to adopt an objective perspective when assessing whether to quit. The signs and signals below indicate when to throw in the towel and leave.


Signs indicating that its time to quit includes:

  • Prolonged neglect of primary care (meals, sleep).

  • You are feeling more negative than positive feelings. Are you consistently experiencing more frustration than joy?

  • Advise from people who care for you and whether the advice is objective.

  • Do you feel heaviness or excitement when you imagine quitting?

  • No solution exists: You have tried to make things different or bring up the issue without success.

  • You are staying for the wrong reasons, such as the fear of not being in a relationship or being judged.

  • If you are staying in the job or relationship because you are afraid that people may criticise you.


Seeking professional support for decision-making can be of great help.

Restoring Peace Counselling and Consultancy offers counselling and psychotherapy for various mental health challenges, self-awareness and life transition. For more information, please visit www.restoringpeace.com.sg or WhatsApp at +65 8889 1848.


Keywords: quit, career change, life transition, counselling, perseverance


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