Why Is Self-compassion Important And How Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) Can Help Build That
- Admin
- 5 days ago
- 3 min read
Updated: 3 days ago
In a world that often emphasises achievement, performance and perfection, many of us talk to ourselves in ways we’d never speak to a friend. We judge our struggles harshly, compare ourselves to others, and blame ourselves for things outside our control. This harsh inner dialogue can take a toll on our emotional and physical well-being. Self-compassion, however, offers a powerful alternative — one rooted in kindness, connection and mindful awareness.
What Is Self-Compassion?
Self-compassion is the practice of extending the same warmth, care and understanding to ourselves that we would offer a good friend in a moment of suffering. Rather than criticising ourselves for mistakes or perceived failures, self-compassion invites us to meet our pain with:
Kindness — treating ourselves gently instead of harshly;
Common humanity — recognising that imperfection, struggle and suffering are shared parts of the human experience;
Mindfulness — acknowledging painful thoughts and feelings without suppressing or exaggerating them.
Research shows that self-compassion supports emotional resilience, enhances adaptive coping, improves self-acceptance, and is linked with greater psychological well-being and emotional regulation.
Why Self-Compassion Matters
1. Reduces Self-Criticism and Emotional Distress
People who practice self-compassion tend to experience less anxiety, shame and self-criticism. They’re more likely to approach life’s challenges with a balanced and caring mindset.
2. Improves Emotional Regulation and Resilience
Instead of reacting impulsively or avoiding difficult emotions, self-compassion encourages a compassionate engagement with feelings. This can prevent overwhelm and promote healthier decision-making.
3. Fosters Acceptance and Connectedness
Understanding that everyone struggles helps reduce the sense of isolation that comes with personal hardship. When we recognise that suffering is a part of being human, it becomes easier to embrace both our strengths and vulnerabilities.
4. Encourages Healthy Behaviour Change
Self-compassion doesn’t mean complacency — it means giving ourselves support and encouragement to grow, rather than criticism that can lead to shame and avoidance.
How ACT Supports Self-Compassion
Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is an evidence-based therapeutic approach rooted in mindfulness, psychological flexibility, and values-driven action. Rather than encouraging people to eliminate difficult thoughts and emotions, ACT helps them accept these experiences while taking committed steps toward a meaningful life.
At its core, ACT cultivates psychological flexibility — the ability to stay present, open and non-judgmental with inner experience while acting in alignment with personal values. This combination naturally fosters self-compassion by reducing the struggle with painful internal experiences.
ACT Processes That Build Self-Compassion
Here’s how ACT specifically supports the development of self-compassion:
Mindfulness and Acceptance
ACT teaches clients to observe thoughts and feelings non-judgementally, noticing them without getting swept into self-criticism or avoidance. This mindful stance mirrors self-compassion’s core element of meeting suffering with awareness rather than aversion.
Cognitive Defusion
Instead of identifying with harsh self-judgments (“I am a failure”), ACT helps people see thoughts as events in the mind — not facts — reducing their emotional impact and allowing space for gentle self-response.
Values Clarification and Committed Action
ACT encourages people to define what matters most and take action aligned with these values even when uncomfortable thoughts and feelings arise. Taking value-driven action with acceptance cultivates a supportive stance toward oneself.
Self as Context
ACT helps individuals view themselves from a broader perspective as more than their negative thoughts or stories. This shift fosters compassion by creating psychological space from self-criticism.
Restoring Peace is a private mental health centre that provides in-person and online counselling and psychotherapy for children, youth, and adults with depression, stress, anxiety, trauma, PTSD, personality disorder, and other mental health challenges. For more information, please visit www.restoringpeace.com.sg or WhatsApp at +65 8889 1848. You may also join our Telegram group, https://t.me/restoringpeace, for periodic updates.
Additional Read:
References [APA style]
American Psychological Association. (n.d.). Acceptance and commitment therapy (ACT). Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/sg/therapy-types/acceptance-and-commitment-therapy
Germer, C. K. (2025). The transformative power of self-compassion. Psychology Today. https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/flourish-and-thrive/202511/the-transformative-power-of-self-compassion
Neff, K. D., & Tirch, D. D. (2013). Self-compassion and ACT. In T. B. Kashdan & J. Ciarrochi (Eds.), Mindfulness, acceptance, and positive psychology: The seven foundations of well-being (pp. 78–106). Context Press / New Harbinger Publications. https://pmc.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/articles/PMC4260406/
Salamon, M. (2022). What is self-compassion? Cleveland Clinic Health Essentials. https://health.clevelandclinic.org/self-compassion
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