Abusive relationships are profoundly distressing and leave emotional and sometimes
physical scars on the individuals involved. The negative impact of such relationships can
extend far beyond the time spent within them, affecting mental and emotional well-being.
Recognising the signs of an abusive relationship is crucial for healing and recovery.
Abusive relationships come in various forms of harm, including emotional, physical, sexual,
and psychological abuse. Emotional abuse, in particular, is a precursor to other types of
abuse. Emotional abuse involves the persistent mistreatment of an individual through
behaviours such as humiliation, manipulation, and control aimed at undermining the
victim’s self-worth and limiting autonomy.
Recognising potential indicators of an abusive relationship includes:
• Feeling intimidated by your partner's anger.
• Hesitating to express disagreement with your partner, accompanied by a sense of
guilt when you do.
• Experiencing physical harm, such as being pushed, kicked, or subjected to other
forms of physical abuse by your partner.
• Being restricted from seeing friends and family due to your partner's jealousy or
anger.
• Frequently enduring harsh criticism, disrespectful language, and name-calling from
your partner.
• Feeling compelled to acquiesce to your partner's desires, be it attending events,
engaging in activities, or engaging in sexual activities, and fearing saying "no".
• Having to provide constant explanations regarding your whereabouts, activities, and
the people you interact with to appease your partner's anger.
• Observing that your partner exercises greater control over your finances than you
do.
• Spending a significant amount of time apologising and making promises to your
partner.
Recognising these signs is crucial for individuals who suspect they might be in an abusive
relationship, as well as for friends and family who want to support their loved ones in such
situations. Therapy can play a pivotal role in assisting victims of abuse in several ways. Therapy provides a safe and confidential space for survivors to share their experiences and feelings.
Therapists can also educate individuals about the dynamics of abusive relationships, helping
them recognise the signs and patterns of abuse. Although the recovery process can be
challenging, therapy can provide the tools and strategies needed to heal from the trauma of
abuse. Therapy may involve an integration of talk therapy with trauma-informed therapy
customised to the individual needs. Well-researched trauma-informed therapy includes
EMDR, Brainspotting, Somatic Experiencing and Expressive Therapy. Joining a therapy
support group is also beneficial for mutual support and healing.
Restoring Peace is a private mental health centre which provides counselling and psychotherapy services for anxiety, depression, trauma, grief and various mental health and
relationship challenges. Our clients include children, youth, and adults from diverse social,
cultural and religious backgrounds. For more information, please visit
www.restoringpeace.com.sg or WhatsApp at +65 8889 1848. For periodic updates, we invite
you to join our telegram group, https://t.me/restoringpeace.
Additional Read:
Keywords: abusive relationships, physical, emotional, sexual, psychological, well-being, self-
worth, trauma, EMDR, Brainspotting, somatic experiencing, group therapy, recovery,
healing
Sources:
https://psychcentral.com/lib/emotional-abuse-signs#signs-of-emotional-abuse
https://www.weber.edu/CounselingCenter/relationship-violence.html